Just like anything that is torn, broken hearts require mending.
Unfortunately, the process of putting those pieces back together can be rather difficult. Each experience of heartache is different, thus, there is not a single formula that will help fix every case.
However, there are three basic stitches that can be used to ensure that your shattered heart is mended properly.
Stitch #1: Get it all out
This first stitch is extremely important.
The worst thing you could possibly do when you are feeling hurt is bottle it up. Yes, it is hard to feel your heart being ripped apart, and the natural reaction is to try and suppress such unpleasant emotions, but don’t do it.
When you bury heartache, it does not simply go away. It goes dormant. Eventually, it will rise to the surface, making you feel the pain all over again.
One way or the other, your heart is going to force you to face your feelings- might as well get it over with sooner than later.
So, get it all out! Let yourself mourn the loss of something that was once wonderful. Remember that it is okay to cry. The pain you are feeling just shows that you loved with all of your heart. You used it well. Now it is time to use it in a different way.
Stitch #2: Get busy
When your whole life seems to be crumbling before your eyes, it is easy to give up and slump into a depression.
Don’t do it.
Don’t let that empty hole in your chest turn into a black hole, taking with it every hope of happiness. Instead, fill that space with your dreams and stitch it back together.
Get out and do things. Have fun. Learn something new.
If you have always wanted to learn how to play the guitar, sign up for lessons. Join that book club. Have a girls’ night. Learn how to cook that fancy dish you love. Go on walks with your dog. Visit your cousin in California you’ve been dying to see for the past 3 years. Volunteer at a soup kitchen. Be around people.
Don’t lock yourself in the house with chick flicks and chocolate chunk ice cream. This kind of behavior is acceptable for the first night or two, but after that, it is time to get busy finding a new happy place.
Stitch #3: Feel
When a heart is broken, it is crucial that the owner mends it properly.
Unfortunately, too many people neglect to use this last, most important stitch when trying to recover from heartache. This final stitch requires you to open your heart back up and feel love again.
Often those who have suffered from a torn heart will attempt this stitch, but fail to feel the proper emotion required to complete it. Instead, they will open their heart up to feelings of anger, bitterness, depression, anxiety, regrets, hate, revenge, self-pity and insecurity.
Allowing your heart to dwell on these feelings will not help your heart to heal. It will twist and harden it.
The only feelings that will help fix your shattered heart are love, forgiveness, happiness, confidence and peace.
Now, I know these are not easily felt when one experiences the sorrow of heartache. However, it is very important that you allow yourself to feel these emotions. Feelings of love and forgiveness heal emotional wounds like nothing else can.
As you use these three simple stitches in your life, you will feel your broken pieces begin to mend.
Remember that healing takes time. There is no “quick fix” for mending a broken heart. You will still have to go through the heartache and pain. However, using these stitches will help your wounds to heal correctly and give you back a healthy and happy heart.